The procedures went well, nothing unexpected turned up, and I go back to the specialist in two weeks for biopsy results. The sedation was unparralled. I will blog more about this another time. In the meantime "Keep on taking the tablets".

I'm entering the state of suspended animation that comes with a long term absence from work and social life. I've been here before, and I'm doing my best, but I'm having extreme mood swings, sometimes affected by outside influences. The swings vary from happiness to utter despair.

The despair end of the spectrum is facilitated by the utter selfishness of two of my 'friends'.

One, we'll call her Kate, has always been fairly useless at being proactive in friendship. You know, the sort of person you speak to regularly as long as you ring them. She married one of my friends, moving from a different area, so we became friends by default I guess, but over the years, I thought we'd become quite close. In the last six months, I have become increasingly resentful of making all the running and have significantly cut down on the amount of times I call her. Result? I've heard nothing from her for weeks, since I last called. I know, with friends like this.....but I also know that when a crisis hits her, my phone will start ringing.

So how do I deal with this? In one respect, I'd like to let her know how much her disregard of me hurts, and say that this is why she has lost touch with friends from university (they got fed up of always being the ones to contact/make arrangements) and that this is why she has no other friends (she's been introduced to lots of people, who later on, have said to me in passing 'Kate never rings me/rings me back. Can't be bothered with that. Shame really, I quite liked her'). In another, I know I should just leave it and be unavailable when the inevitable occurs.
Which will be hard, as I've know her husband for 15 years, and If I ditch her, I ditch him.

The second is more hurtful, because the behaviour is out of character. I can only assume I have done something to offend (brain racked, nothing found) or that he just can't be bothered.

I know all the above will be magnified by the fact that I'm a bit ill at the moment and that I'm stuck at home a lot. I'm trying hard not to sink into a depression, but some days it's just really difficult. But I have other excellent friends who are good at giving me a swift kick in the pants when required. I think it's time to book a foot/butt contact and get myself together.

I had a doctors appointment on Wednesday. The usual receptionist was back in place.

Me: Hi, I have an appointment with Dr Raj at 4.10?
Her:(smiles)Hello, is it name?
Me: It is.
Her: Would you like to go straight in?
Me: Thank you.

And it's that easy.

Also on the postitive side, the conversion of the derelict building next door is going well, judging by the amount of noise created. I'd especially like to commend the chap who was cutting new stone with an angle grinder/stillsaw at 5.30am yesterday morining.